Tuesday, 29 July 2014

Tuesday the 29th; July 14... Positivity & the Glad Game

Anyone out there old enough to remember the story of Pollyanna may have a slight aversion to the word positivty. Me, I loved that story and I know you have heard me say "positive" many times in relation to what my family is going through at the moment. I don't want to give you a false impression though. This is not an easy ride. Cancer has the ability to kick the sunshine and lollipops right out of you, and it does. Sometimes several times a day. Sometimes blatantly and others it just sneaks up on you unexpectedly and BAM, you feel like you've been hit by a ton of bricks.

We are just about to wrap up the 7 days of toxicity from chemo no#1 and it has been a bit of a roller coaster ride with Bren being commandeered to his own bathroom,  because putting it delicately he is getting rid of toxic waste that is harmful to the kids health, and then there are mood swings among other side effects of the medication. Not that you would know. Chemo brain [yep similar to baby brain]...I had never heard of it before the nurse mentioned it at lifehouse and to be honest the kids think that's hysterical! Then  Bren having a lowered immune system also added a little element of scary when on Saturday Tyz reached a temp of 39.8 to go with her rattly cough and runny nose. At the moment if he gets a temp higher than 38, it's straight to emergency at Manning Base for the big fella...so we are being cautious, to say the least.

That's life at the moment, our new normal and we know this too shall all pass...so we choose to take the good with the bad, roll with the punches and get on with it.

I have had some lovely comments since sharing our story and appreciate them very much. I share it for many reasons, and one of those is me. It helps to write the words and send them out into the universe whether they are being read or not. I promise you though that I feel about as courageous sharing this story as I a footballer playing a Friday night game in front of the nation, or a mountain climber reaching the peak of Everest. Sports, extreme or otherwise although often explained as courageous, aren't at all, not as far as I am concerned. Inspiring, yes, interesting for sure, but they are self serving first so courageous... no I don't think so.

Getting up every day and going to work, putting your life on the line to serve others, that's courageous. So is getting up every day, putting a smile on your face and getting on with life in the face of a disease that can take that life. Anonymous, nameless people to most of us are doing those things quietly, with grace and determination every single day, or have done so courageously... and some heartbreakingly are no longer with us.

Most of us are unaware that we may pass a hero in the street, at the park or even at the grocery store each day without ever knowing, the very luckiest of us get to sleep beside one every night.

So in the spirit of Pollyanna I will continue to play the Glad Game and stay as positive as I can, as often as I can. This week I'm glad that Brens first Chemo, 7 days on, has been tolerable for him. I'm also very glad that modern medicine has come a long, long way. We keep hearing that recovery from each treatment is harder as they progress. I am really glad that so far the first one hasn't been too awful; it gives Bren a better platform from which to jump into the next one. That's my glad game for today.

Thank you Pollyanna ... I love rainbows too :)

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